Living With HPV: Safe Sex and How To Avoid STDs


This piece was written by an anonymous source - but it's still a massively important issue. Read carefully, and be safe!!!!!!!
After being diagnosed with HPV a few months ago following a break up, I was totally shocked. Why did this happen to me? How will I get rid of it and why did I not take care of myself properly in order to prevent it?
I am a 22 year old studying Art in an English university. Since my first boyfriend - which I was together with for one and a half years, I had a lot of short term relationships, affairs or one night stands. I think it is fair enough for a girl to have one night stands, even if this model is not very established in our society yet (even though the attitude towards one night stands completely shifts if it is a guy doing it).
Enjoying some love affairs here and there is great to gain experience for a girl, or anyone, in sex life. Boys mature sexually before girls a lot of the time, and I felt after having my first boyfriend – the sex was so exciting that I apparently can't even remember it very well. To have sex with other men was like growing up to a woman - and I enjoyed sex afterwards.
Full of excitement for the new experiences, I forgot about myself more and more. The basic safety precautions which you need to consider as a girl - and which you were normally constantly being reminded of in school or by your parents when you were younger, were blown away by the charm or the naked body of a guy.
Integrity means amongst others to be incorruptible. If I would have had a lot of integrity after my last relationship I would have known my exact borders at all times. This means you have to be able to say no. And this means to be safe at all times. Some guys look incredible, some are super sweet and when even your friends tell you that this person would be a good choice which you cannot let go, it is most important now than ever to reflect your feelings, thoughts and your values.
After I found out about my disease a period of constant care about myself started. Once I needed to take care of my physical health, I found my mental health was effected in a positive way. I was not able to sleep with anybody for a few months. This was hard because you still feel you need to. And you feel bound of something which all your friends are able to experience but you are not.
After being half way cured I was starting to think why all this happened to me and why I did not take care of myself in the first place. But I think growing up as a women is hard in most cases if you lack self confidence and you did not learn it from your parents, or your home or through your friends. It is so easy to say yes and so hard to care after yourself especially when you are in love and in a haze of unreal expectations.
I learned from this experience that I need to trust my instincts more than ever before. If you are a girl most guys try to sleep with you and to “win the trophy” so to say. Even if you have a boyfriend you still need to take care about yourself and your borders and safety. If I would not have trusted my ex-boyfriend I would have not suffered from HPV in the end. But this opened up so many questions to me about other boys and my relationships to them that I start to feeling stronger day by day.

This article was written by someone else, someone who would like to remain anonymous.

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