Why do you care?

07:19

Why do people, most specifically people of the internet and tabloids etc, care about people coming out? And why am I so annoyed about the fact that people care? I think it's good that this topic is finally being brought to attention - the fact that no one actually really cares about the person, their feelings or lifestyle, rather they care that they know first.






To try and give myself some perspective (although on a much, much smaller scale) I thought back to how I came out. At a family party, very dramatically yes I admit - but after that I didn't tell anyone that didn't need to know. I told my close friends and no one else, just let everyone figure it out for themselves if they cared. Which they didn't, because in no way shape or form did it contribute to their lives whatsoever. If I'm being fair, the people that cared too much were either people who thought it was a novelty or people who wanted to ridicule and bully me (although it really isn't bullying, I do feel sorry for my bullies, they obviously had shit going on in their own heads that needed sorting out). And it's those people that cared too much that have the issue.

Looking back at the bigger scale now, take George Shelley coming out recently for example, if he wasn't in the public eye - no one would care. I'm completely bewildered as to why anyone cares now, it is his lifestyle! The people on twitter who voice their opinions on how they're uncomfortable with a different kind of lifestyle (usually in the type of tweet that involves some derogatory word for gay people, or any other type of hate), the people who bombard him with tweets and follow his every move now because they think they have a chance with him - I just don't understand. To a degree, I guess you can put part of it to fan culture and look at how social media let's fans feel somewhat personally connected to these people - but I still just can't justify caring so much for something that matters so little to you if at all.

Bringing it back down to the small yet still as important scale, I understand that the LGBT+ community is a minority in the UK (it's reported that only 5-7% of the population is LGBT) but it's a strong one still. Over the past few years people have become a lot more accepting, not near enough to how they should be, but still - progress is being made. Tabloids, toxic people online and just idiotic people you've probably come into contact with in real life are stopping the feeling that it doesn't matter what you are. It's so cliché to say, but it's true, it doesn't matter who you love to anyone but yourself and who you love. Even your family, yes they have to live with you (congrats to them) but they have nothing at all to do with it, they aren't the third person in your relationship. 

I just really can't fathom it. Why is this still such a big thing? If George Shelley didn't upload that video, if he just got a boyfriend and didn't tell anyone, what would happen? Obviously a bigger fanfare and a lot more backlash. Why didn't he tell us? Why keep it a secret? It's a vicious cycle, one that needs to be broken. The more people bring attention to it the less chance it has of dying down. Yet I don't think that will happen very quickly because people get too wrapped up in these things.


Coming out really shouldn't be necessary. I think most people have this frame of mind now. People should do what they feel comfortable with, and I think coming out undermines that. You're making a big deal out of something that should be normal, we shouldn't need to do this. We shouldn't have to bring the attention to it (and that's coming from me, the worlds biggest attention seeker). 


This was v stream of conscious-y and I just wrote what plopped into my head. I'm sorry if I've offended, upset or annoyed anyone - it wasn't intentional. And I'm also v sorry if this makes no sense, but I hope I've got my point across. 

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